Are You Burnt Out from Trying to Stop the Meltdowns?
Do you ever wish you could hang a sign on your head that says “Out of Order,”
Just so everyone would leave you alone for five seconds?
Every parent has this experience.
Between managing the household for multiple people,
Keeping dinner on the table,
Making sure everyone’s shoes has a pair,
And trying to find the seconds in between to brush your own teeth,
It’s easy to feel extremely burnt out after a while.
Throw the meltdown cycle in there and you feel like you don’t even have a chance for peace.
But I’m not going to sit here and just talk about how burnt out you are.
That’s what most mommy bloggers do, and they never really get to the point…
Other than reminding you to wash your hair and put on clean socks.
Which I am in favor of!
But I’m even MORE interested in talking about what you can do to fix this problem.
Not only this problem of the pervasive meltdowns…
But this problem where you feel burnt out from trying to manage your kid’s emotions.
This is not the way you expected to feel as a parent.
I’m sure you were prepared to feel like you didn’t have much free time within the first few years of their lives…
But if your child or teen is still struggling with managing their big feelings,
You are most likely still feeling spread too thin.
And how could you feel any different in your current situation?
It’s more than time you are losing to these explosions and shutdowns from your kids.
Your kid isn’t learning the skills they need to manage their emotions,
And the mental weight of that is crushing.
You might have already noticed that, as many parents will try all sorts of solutions to break out of this pattern… and there are 3 trends we will discuss today.
- Be careful- burnout can quickly lead to a victim mentality…
When you’re drained it’s easy to watch other families experience happiness and joy regularly and think: why is my kid doing this?
Why me?
Will this ever get better?
- The meltdown cycle can simply be due to a mismatch in parenting.
Judging yourself for ‘doing it wrong’ keeps you stuck in the meltdown cycle alongside your child.
Highly Sensitive kids can’t be parented in a traditional manner… and the love you extend through trendy ‘gentle parenting’ isn’t likely systematic enough either.
So, it makes perfect sense that you feel lost– and that lost experience can keep you stuck in overwhelm.
- Your kid isn’t learning the skills they need to manage their emotions…
You are all stuck in the meltdown cycle. Every family member. NOt just you, not just your HSC.
So everyone needs to learn together to eliminate your child’s perception that they are the scapegoat.
So, you might have tried a few things to get yourself out of one or all of these patterns..
Therapy; self care; yoga; exercise; more girl time- (that your kid won’t let you go to)– here’s why that doesn’t work sustainably.
- It’s only one piece of the puzzle– this is the same as those mom bloggers who tell you to just love your kid and the meltdowns will melt away— easier said than done when they’re daily and you’re fried and you’re literally being smacked in the face and they’re chucking toys at their little brother.
- You’re not working with your child to change the way they manage their emotions and solve problems in a creative rather than rigid manner
You can fix that.
The only way to heal the burnout and stop the meltdown/shutdown cycle is to adjust your parenting strategy.
If books and podcasts and passing advice worked,
You wouldn’t be THIS burnt out trying to juggle your child’s emotional state.
Be careful- burnout can quickly lead to a victim mentality…
And it’s important to keep in mind that your kid isn’t doing this on purpose.
They don’t WANT to have meltdowns. It’s really tough on them too.
And I’m not blaming your child for having big feelings, or you.
The meltdown cycle can simply be due to a mismatch in parenting.
And the best part is, it can take as little as 8 weeks.
You can start from exactly where you are.
There is no point in waiting to see if things will improve.
This is not something that your child will grow out of.
The meltdown cycle going unbroken will bleed into other areas of your child’s life.
If your child doesn't learn how to manage their emotions,
They learn how to become a people-pleaser to keep the peace.
They skip out on opportunities because they don’t know how to cope with their nerves.
Through their teen years, they are more likely to engage in promiscuity and struggle with addiction.
The point is, emotions don’t just disappear.
Your child needs to learn how to discharge them.
If they don’t,
They’ll find another way to avoid them, and it’s often not in the healthiest way.
You need to deal with this NOW not only for your own sake,
But to help your child have the best future possible.
To do that, you need to implement these five steps:
Playfully communicate your expectations of your child, as well as your needs and their responsibilities.
Give your kid specific feedback including a strategy for THEM, so you can stop walking on eggshells and cross your fingers to avoid a meltdown.
Teach your child to advocate for themselves, and advocate for them.
Change the way you think about your child, their needs, and what they are capable of.
And change the way you think of yourself.
You are a ROCKSTAR.
You are doing the work to figure this out, and you may have just found exactly how to break the meltdown cycle.
We won’t know for sure until you hit step #5, which is to book a free call with our team.
At MTC, we’ve helped hundreds of families solve this problem.
You need expert guidance to walk you through this fire gracefully,
Because the way you are doing it now is leaving you fried to a crisp.
And you cannot be your best self if you feel stuck in this state.
Book a call with our team. You deserve to feel like you can breathe again, and so does your kid.
megghanthompsoncoaching.com/talk
For families with high schoolers
