No time of the year is âeasyâ for parents of HSCs.
Whether your kid gets super stressed after Christmas âŠ
Hates the change in seasons âŠ
Or experiences extreme anxiety at the start of a new semester âŠ
One time that clients at MTC frequently tell us is a minefield, is the end of the school year.
While most kids are excited for the long, school-free days ahead, for HSCs, the change in routine can be triggering.
This is why itâs so important you know what to do to support them through the transition.
Because your actions here can be the difference between a fun-filled summer, full of amazing memories that last a lifetime -- for them and for you âŠ
And a summer of meltdowns, arguments, and wishing away the days!
To help you out, I put together a quick rundown of summer transition myths vs. facts âŠ
AKA: Your End of Year School Survival Guide:
Myth: Their behavior is manipulative or intentionally difficult.
Fact: Their meltdowns are a result of emotional dysregulation and distress,...
NEWSFLASH: You donât have to âcopeâ with your child being different.
Because being different isnât a problem.
In fact ⊠Itâs a GOOD THING.
I know that might sound weird.
After all, as parents of HSCs, you can often be judged because your kiddo doesnât conform to social norms.
But when we work with parents here at MTC, we make sure our clients donât just learn to âget byâ with an HSC âŠ
⊠but actively CELEBRATE their childâs differences.
Now, you might be thinking -
âBut Megghan, my child can be challenging. I love them soooo much âŠ
But I donât know how their challenges are an advantage?â
If thatâs you, then here are 5 reasons to LOVE parenting an HSC:
Reason 1: Theyâre highly creative.
I guarantee your kid notices way more small details than the average child.
And while this might sometimes be frustrating if they stop for 20 minutes when youâre out walking to look at a bug, or a piece of dirt âŠ
This attention to detail means theyâre highly creative.
Lots of HSCs thrive wh...
Ever feel like you and your kid are speaking different languages?
And I donât just mean theyâre speaking French, which you studied in high school so you can kinda pick up the odd word âŠ
More like youâre speaking Spanish and theyâre speaking Swahili.
If so, thatâs a common situation for a lot of HSC parents.
Most I speak with, in fact.
And this clash can make it super difficult to understand their behavior.
Because you wonder why theyâre behaving in a way thatâs so alien.
And all the reasoning and persuasion in the world doesnât seem to do anything.
Well, hereâs the thing -
While you might think you know the reason your kid is acting up, or having a tough time âŠ
The real reason probably isnât what you think.
See, where most kidsâ challenges are fairly obvious âŠ
The cause of an HSCâs distress, or anger, or frustration is usually a lot deeper, beneath the surface.
Itâs easy to assume this is caused by a gap in empathy.
But itâs not.
Itâs caused by a gap in skill.
Ie. Itâs ...
Giving your child praise can be tricky.
That might sound like a weird thing to say.
Because kids like praise, right?
But how do you know when youâre praising them TOO much?
The truth is, thereâs no such thing as âtoo muchâ praise âŠ
Provided youâre giving them praise in the right way.
Consistent and meaningful praise boosts your child's self-esteem and promotes positive behavior.
Which calms the outbursts, eliminates meltdowns, and helps them be happy and confident.
But praise needs to be authentic.
Otherwise, your child will pick up that youâre not being sincere.
And all the âwell donesâ in the world become meaningless.
Likewise, you canât just layer the praise on thick, 24/7.
You need to offer them criticism, too.
Okay, I donât mean you just throw in some criticism for the sake of it.
But just like youâd with anyone, you donât just want to praise your kid for every last thing they do.
And you donât just want to stay quiet when they make a mistake.
Otherwise, they donât...
Itâs time for the showdown to end all showdowns âŠ
To settle a debate thatâs raging in the world of HSC parenting âŠ
And for the gloves to come off, once and for all.
Because the question is -
Whatâs the BEST way to parent an HSC - With passive parenting, or with punishment?
Before I reveal which one you need to prioritize, let me give a little bit of background.
Passive parenting (or gentle parenting) involves taking a step back, and not getting overly emotionally-involved when your kid is having a meltdown, or struggling to cope.
Thereâs a definite benefit to this.
I mean, we know that if your child is highly charged, the last thing you want to be is highly charged, too.
But at the same time, passive parenting can lead to a lack of boundaries.
You end up being physically present ⊠But mentally absent.
Parents who do this fail to provide the emotional support, guidance and attention their child needs.
They treat their child as fragile.
And that only worsens the meltdown cyc...
Do you DREAD family parties?
Does the thought of being invited out for a meal send you into a whirlwind of stress?
And would you rather do just about anything than navigate a new social situation with your child?
If youâre reading this, Iâm guessing your answers to the above were âYes, yes, and a great big ⊠YES!â
Thatâs because dealing with social situations when you have an HSC is tough.
Doesnât matter if weâre talking about a big family party âŠ
A smaller, more intimate meal or cookout âŠ
Or even just playdates with one other kid.
Any parent of an HSC knows just how stressful these can be.
Youâve probably turned down more invites than you want to think about.
Or left places early so many times, people have stopped even bothering to ask you out anymore.
But the worst thing about all this?
The shame you can feel as your kid goes into a meltdown, or struggles to cope when others are around.
And hey, thereâs nothing at all to be ashamed about here âŠ
But still, you get self-c...
I got pretty mad the other day.
It was after a conversation with a client âŠ
And no, it was nothing sheâd done.
This gal is a rockstar, and an amazing advocate for her kid.
But I got mad, because of something she told me sheâd overheard.
This lady was waiting to pick her child up from school, and was standing just round the corner from a group of other moms.
To protect her identity, I wonât name any names.
But basically, not realizing my client was out of earshot, these other moms were talking about her kid.
And the words âweak, shy, and overly emotionalâ came up.
Understandably, my client was very upset.
Because no mom wants to hear her kid being talked about like that.
Especially when itâs just not true.
See, the big misconception about HSCs is that theyâre weak, because they need extra attention âŠ
That theyâre shy, because they often avoid social situations, and keep themselves to themselves âŠ
And that theyâre overly emotional, because, well ⊠You donât need me to expla...
Screaming and shouting âŠ
Yelling in your face and telling you they hate you âŠ
Slamming doors, punching walls, and throwing books all over the room âŠ
If any of these happen the minute you try to get your kid to do homework -
Welcome to the world of parenting an HSC!
Most of us didnât like homework when we were at school.
And maybe we tried everything we could to get out of it, or chose to leave that book report or calculus revision âtil the very last minute âŠ
But we all kinda sucked it up, and accepted homework as a necessary evil.
That doesnât happen with HSC kids though.
And actually, I hear of truly terrible situations, every single day, in my Facebook group.
Iâve heard about parents being threatened.
Or school books being ripped up in protest.
Angry phone calls home from teachers, demanding to know why this weekâs assignment wasnât done.
And even if your kid doesnât have a full-blown meltdown, sometimes simply seeing the struggle they go through and the frustration they...
Thereâs something NO ONE is talking about when it comes to parenting highly sensitive children.
Neglecting this one thing is a surefire way to keep you stuck in the meltdown cycle âŠ
With a kid who stays unpredictable and volatile âŠ
Leaving you tiptoeing around, worried about what to say 24/7 âŠ
And making you feel like youâre doing something âwrong.â
What one thing am I talking about?
Mindset.
I donât mean your kiddoâs mindset either.
I mean your mindset.
Now, you might be thinking -
âBut Megghan, what does MY mindset have to do with ending the meltdown cycle, and helping my child be calm, confident and sociable?â
Well ⊠A LOT!
Mindset is something we place a big emphasis on at MTC.
And for good reason.
Because weâve seen just how amazing the outcomes are when parents stop trying to âfixâ their kid, and start working on their own mindset first.
But if youâre on the fence and still not convinced, here are 4 reasons why you need to work on your own mindset:
1. Mindset Work...
Ever feel like youâre walking on eggshells at home?
One moment, your HSC is calm, loving and content âŠ
The next, theyâre in full-blown meltdown mode âŠ
And then soon after, they totally shut down?
If so, let me tell you something -
This is expected in the meltdown cycle.
In the world of HSCs, going from one emotion to another super quickly isnât uncommon at all.
We call this âThe shutdown/ irritability cycle.â
Just because itâs expected though, doesnât make it any easier to deal with.
And it definitely doesnât mean you canât do anything about the stress this causes, either.
Because if weâre being totally honest, you donât want to feel like youâre constantly walking on eggshells at home, right?
Worried that you might say or do something that triggers a meltdown.
Or send them into shutdown mode.
Or that you may use the wrong parenting approach for a given situation, because you havenât realized your kiddoâs mood has totally switched.
Thatâs no way for you to live âŠ
And itâs...
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